Sooo, driving to work today, and listening to Cisn.  Sean burke is going to go horse back riding for the first time.  They're throwing the guy on a stallion.  His comment:  a Stallion riding a stallion....

I tried sooo hard to call in.  If Sean is a Stallion when he rides one, what does that make him when he rides a Donkey? 

 

Have you checked out the New York Islanders website yet?  Ryan Smyth made the front page.  Lucky bastards.  Good ol Peter Pocklington has defended Kevin Low for what he did......

 

Edmonton fans have to quit moaning and groaning and understand reality," Pocklington said. "Acquiring those players and that pick for an unrestricted (31-year-old) free agent could launch the team's new future."

Just like the Gretzky trade did, he added.

"The Trade," as it's come to be known, brought the Oilers $15-million U.S. in cash, Jimmy Carson, Martin Gelinas, and the Kings' first-round draft picks for 1989, 1991 and 1993 - the last of which was Jason Arnott.

 

Hey, Puck just to refresh your memory, none of those guys play for Edmonton anymore.  we made them who they are, and sent them on their way.....and they laughed all the way to the bank.  if some one offered me 1 million dollars a year to do something that I love, i would jump on it in a heart beat.  Someone should make these guys realize that it's not all about the money...it's about the love of the game.  Hey, i sound like Jerry Maquire!  Show ME the money.  ~~Could i be more dorky?

I googled myself today!  How exciting it was to actually find me!  A while ago, I posted an entry on Jennifer Parks (Edmonton Sun columnist) blog-website-talky space.  Wow. Thats what came up.  I guess it could be worse.  At least there are no nudie pics of me out there.  Not like they would be  #1 on a Google search.  How scary!  I hope that doesn't give you nightmares!  Anyone else ever googled themselves?  Indulging yourself like that is just what the doctor ordered!

Something I learned today.  My left hand and wrist are WAY smaller then my right.  I was coming back from the loo, wearing my bracelet on my left wrist, and is freaking flew off!  So, move it over to the right.  low and behold, it stays.  One of life's little mysteries. 

I have heard a bagillion times that Edmonton has the worst drivers in Canada......and I have always been offended by this.....Until i started REALLY paying attention to the other drivers. 

#1-A signal light is there for a reason.  The doo-hicky switch is RIGHT there

#2-Eating and talking on your phone is a smidgen dangerous.  What hand is on the steering wheel?  Never mind!  Duh.  You must be using your knees

#3-I remember thinking my mom had eyes in the back of her head when I was little.  Other drivers must have that, too! (lucky bastards)  I didn't see one person shoulder check on my way to work today.  and 3 of them almost hit me.

I wonder how long Edmonton will keep up the farce of the "City of Champions"?  what are we champions in?  Murders?  Bad drivers?  police scandals?  Bad bloggers?

ROTFLMAO

~~AH  

 

 

 

I decided to hold off on posting until the NHL trade deadline was over.  I am sitting here in absolute shock.  If you have no clue what I am talking about, you are either not from Edmonton, or deaf, dumb and blind.  I really wonder what the game will be like without Smitty tonight.  Hopefully the boys will pull it together, and follow in the footsteps of "The Moose".  Messier pulled the boys out of the 'losing Getz" funk, and went on to win the cup.  So, boys, get it together, and show the NHL that Edmonton still does have the best team in the league.  Or, at least the one with the most heart, and by far the BEST fans.

Here's to you Smitty, thanks for the memories, the plays, and pissing off the goalies.  Without you, I would never have had the chance to dangle Sandy in your face.

Is it a good thing or a bad thing that we might not play againt the Isle's?

 

It could be worse, we could have re-aquired Pronger from the Ducks.  C'mon people, be a little positive! 

 

(Andres, you are still my cutie-patootie)

 

 

~AH

 

 

 

 

I hate mondays.  I am a firm believer that people do not spend enough time with their families.  Therefore, we just turn Monday in to the last day of the weekend.  I'm sure most of you would agree. 

My weigh-in didn't go as I planned.  I still have weight to lose.  Doh.  I was hoping to get on the enemy (aka the scale) and find a miracle.  sadly, no miracle.  I still have 18.8 pounds to goal.  I am getting so close, and it is driving me bonkers!! I wore a pair of jeans and a shirt to mom and dad's yesterday, that I haven't been able to fit into in about 7 years.  How kick ass is that?  Although, I did have some cute lil handles!  Is it possible to give yourself liposuction?  How great would that be?

 

Never underestimate the power of an Aunt.  Ask my little nephew Dylan how old his mommy is.  He'll tell you 28.  Ask him how old he is.  He'll tell you that he's "free".  Ask him how old his Oma is.....Oma is a Dinosaur.  And Opa is older then dirt.  I wonder who taught him that.  Dylan's Opa (my dad) tried to teach Dylan some new words, too.  "Auntie only cost $5.95!"  Smart kid.  He never picked that one up.  I told Pam that I need a peg leg, and I'll put Dylan on my shoulder.  Remind me never to leave my children alone with mom and dad, or Pam.  Their revenge would kill me.  Ask Dylan "What's up dawg?"  and his reply us "Nothin', what's up chicken?"  And don't forget that we are all "wack" "word". 

 

And it could be way worse.  Dad taught Tyler to bark.  Yes, my little 15 month old nephew barks.  He fits right into the DeVries gene pool.  He barks for food.  He heard the distinct crinkle of his favorite bag of chips, and the barking began.  Nothing like a 15 month old, and a "free" year old for entertainment.  And even better, crazy Auntie Aya playing a psycho game of peek-a-boo with Tyler.  Started with Boo's and ended with screams.  Loud, crazy, and a blast.

 

Had an absolute blast at a baby shower on Saturday.  And as i was leaving, I got blasted.  Craig, bless his soul, held in his fart until we were outside.  I was sooo nice, helping him and Danette get all the presents out to the van.  After I handed him the last bag, he turns, plants his ass on me and let it rip.  I didn't even have time to react.  .  Sigh.  Reminds me of Denny's.  I do miss all the fun we had there. 

Back to the shower.  I put a hex on Lisa for bringing her chocolate fountain.  Oh, dear god was it good.  And even better was explaing to Arlene was a "punani" was.  She'll never yell that word out again.  We also had a wonderful conversation about Camel Toes, and Moose Knuckles.  You always to learn something at a baby shower!!!!

 

Another Happy Birthday to Sandy!!  Celebrated her 29th and 156 month birthday on Saturday.  Very rarely can Sandy be surprised, but we got her.  And she thanked us with a wonderful dance.  Sandy got jiggy with it.  Dylan would definetly tell her thats she's wack.

 

No wonder why i'm so tired and wanting to back to bed.  I was barely home all weekend.  I should really make up for that, starting right now..  Or else a Tim Horton's run.....either or is good for me....

 

~~AH

TGIF (not like I had a long week or anything!)

The boss was exasperated with his new secretary, a blond.

She ignored the telephone when it rang.

"You must answer the telephone," he told her irritably.

"It seems so silly," she replied. "Nine times out of 10, it's for you."

Hey, I feel that way everyday!  So what's wrong with that?  By the time the I get home from work, I HATE the phone.  Never in a million years would I have ever thought I would feel that way.  When you hit "the age" to be on the phone, you stay on it for hours....even when you have nothing to say.  Am I right?  But why is it, I have to ask, that guys never really got into that.  James has never been a big phone talker.  Even when we first started dating, our conversations lasted a whopping 30 seconds.  All right, I will admit that I was extremly sick at first (a little mono mixed with tonsilitis) and I literally couldn't talk (yes, my mother thanked God many times for that one....).  I just don't understand how it is at possible to retain all the info I give you in 30 seconds or less.  Hmmmmm.  I now have proof that James doesn't listen!!!  There is no possible way!  And anyone who truly knows my hubby knows that most of what he hears goes in one ear, and out the other.  Maybe there just isn't any room in his head...already full of The Matrix, good ol' Warhammer and the newest one...World of Warcraft.  I know it could be worse....could be filled with drugs--I am almost ready to consider WOW a drug.  Anyone else out there who plays....get out of your 2-D world and join us REAL people in the land of 3-D.  Lol.

Here is another thing I don't understand about men....well one of many things....

What's up with the whole girl on girl action?  Do we ask you to be with another guy?  I know everyone has their little fetishes, but how did it come to every guy (minus the gay ones) having the same one???  Starting to become funnier and funnier in my head. 600 guys gawking at 2 girls who are playing the guys by holding the pose of the begining of a kiss.  All women are evil.  And, DAMN, are we ever good at it!!!

I was reading the paper on line this am.  Telus has decided to revoke porn privileges off their phones.  Too many parents are worried that their precious 13 and 14 year old boys are going to download it.  No worries!  They probably won't, they're to busy trying to hide the Playboy Magazines they stole from their Dad.  Tell me what guy never stole their dad's dirty magazines???????

Tomorrow is weigh-in day.  Eeeep!  Here's hoping I have a loss!  I have 20 more pounds to lose (already lost 80) and now I am just getting antsy!  I did up my Wranglers the other day.  I would never wear them out of the house, and I have 2 very good reasons!  In all honesty, i couldn't breathe.  And on top of that....I looked like a muffin.  You know, skinny on the bottom, overflow on top.  Except I didn't look like a regular muffin.  No i looked like one of the giant Costco muffins.  Plesant.  Truly.  James and i had a good laugh about that.  I really do put the Grrrr in Swinger, baby!

Before I forget: My MSN name was at one point "I have a Secret....."  Just to clarify, I am NOT pregnant!     But i will admit that it would be....THE COOLEST THING EVER!!!!!!!!

Oh, and Andres.......here I am writting about you in my blog--you are a handsome young lad who feels like a geek for reading this.  Ahhh, darlin' you're not a geek! But....hey, I don't know you all that well.  Are you a closet geek?  lol...  Hey buddy, my blog kicks ass.  And you be careful.  I'll kick yo ass so hard, you'll starve to death doing cartwheels until next Thursday!  Word, homie!!

One last thing to complete your friday!  I have New Kids on the Block playing on my Ipod right now.  Step by Step, ooo baby,  Gonna get to ya girrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrl!   James, your band should soooooo cover that song! 

~~AH

 

I read this in today's Edmonton Sun.  How crazy cool is this?

(Just a quick little peek to what it said)

Ever wonder if you're related to a prominent historical figure such as Marie Antoinette, Jesse James or Genghis Khan?

Wonder no more.

With the DNA Ancestry Project, a genealogy kit now available at the Bay stores at Southgate Centre and West Edmonton Mall, it's possible to trace your lineage back 150,000 years. The kits - which cost $139 to track your mom's or dad's lineage, or $278 to track both - include a mouth swab to capture your DNA and a CD-ROM that helps you match your DNA online to other people across the world with the same ancestral markers in their DNA.

 

~~AH

Or maybe I just didn't take the course!  As most of you already know, I sit on my butt all day and answer phones, attend to the faxes, send out alot of stuff (stuff that looks like it was written in Greek) and do other fun little jobs.  I love that I have no stress in my job....and I have had alot of stressful jobs.  Lets see.....before VOD and PPV became the rage, I worked as a lowly CSR at Blockbuster Video.  Remember when that place was THE place to be on a Friday/Saturday?  Ahhh, the good old days.  A new release was $4.91 (inc. tax) and was due back the next day by midnight.  Ya, try standing for 7.5 hours straight, at the till that doesn't close, with a line that never ends.  Ug.  I started there right before Christmas....Santa brought me some great Adidas standing sneakers.  Bless you Santa.  I left BBV and headed across Baseline Road, skipped over Broadmoor Boulevard, and started late night serving at Americas's favorite breakfast spot...Denny's.  If there is anything that shakes you up, it's late night @ Denny's.  Nothing like a bunch of drunk idiots to make you sweat.  Some people think serving tables is a joke, and treat servers the same way they would treat the doggie poop that they stepped in.  Try again.  Of all the jobs I have had, this was BY FAR the hardest.  I have never realized how condescending some people are.  Asking if "being a waitress" was the only thing I did.  Taught that Jackass a lesson.  "Gosh, no sir.  I'm in Med School, and I have to pay my full tuition, so, I work here full time, trying to pay my way.  i only sleep 3 hours a night.  Between Studying and work.....I'm exhausted.  but only 3 years more of it!"  Dumbass left me a $20 tip.  Now, I'm not just a waitress, but also a med student/con artist.  Kick Ass!  At any rate, never under estimate the power of your server. 

I also tried the whole management thing at Denny's.  Stress stress stress!  I left Denny's, with some pride in tact (not very much) and headed south across Baseline to........Petersen Pontiac.  That's right, I tried to cut the mustard.  It was a fun job, i have to say.  Nothing like an old man asking for a salesman, me telling him that i am a salesPERSON, and having him look me up and down, give me a disgusted look and tell me that I'm a girl.  Well, Duh.  Good thing he told me that.  i thought that b/c I have boobies and a foo-foo, that that made me boy.  Sales was fun, but....if you didnt sell, you made minimum wage.  If you only sold one car, you only got paid for one car.  Well, with James and I buying a house, and trying to be grown-ups, we made the decision that I had to leave.  My paychecks were either so high, that we could buy Buckingham Palace, or they were so low that we ate ants to survive.  Ok, so I exagerated a tad.  You get my point.

 

At any rate, I applied on Workopolis.com, and had an interview with Amec...and here I sit.  All by myself.  And I love it.  I have never had a Mon-Fri job before (loving it!), but I do miss late night coffee dates, any day of the week.

 

My only complaints....... Phone rings...I answer it.  Some moron is on the phone, telling me that our number was on his call display, and wondering who called him.  Well, buddy, there are about 150 employees here......get a life.  I don't know who just called you, and, really, i don't care.  I love people who spend their day checking caller ID's and wanting to know who called them.  Wrong numbers happen....it's part of life.  Personally, if you call me (esp. on my cell) and i don't know the number, i ain't gonna answer.  I'm not wasting my minutes on wrong numbers.

 

Oh, and really, who got it in their mind that the receptionist knows where everything is, how everything works, and where everyone is.  I know nothing.  I am fully willing to admit this!  I think it was on my second day when someone asked my about some highly safittimacated doo-hicky.  I think I actually drooled a bit and said "duh".  Love it!  Now I just come up with some smart-ass comment.  One of my favorites was yesterday.  Big-head honcho engineer sticks his head in the large boardroom, which, BTW, had no lights on.  Turns to me and asks me if anyone is in there.  Well, gosh, gee, um!  I looked at him with a straight face and replied "Well, you just stuck your head in there.  Tell me: did YOU see anyone in there?  Sorry, couldn't help it.  At least I got a good laugh out them. 

 

Besides saying: I have no idea, not a clue or go away, I also tend to tell people that I will wave my Magic Wand, do a little dance, and say a good ol' bibity bobity boo!  Hopefully it will get you away from me.......unless you can tell me when the next Mind Reading Class is.  I will gladly take it!

 

~~Andrea

So, I'm starting a blog.  Anyone surprised?  Hey, now I have a place to talk, where non of ya'll can tell me to shut up!  Sweeeeeet!

Luckily I can do this at work (like I actually work @ work), so my updates will be filled with wonderful anecdotes of my days at work.  Here we go: ............................

Ok, so i work with a bunch of engineers.  Nothing to say!  ROTFLMAO!!!!!!!!  

So we just passed a WONDERFUL long weekend.  well, a long weekend for most, I got greedy and took an extra day.  My darling husband (oh, GAG!   ) decided to join me.  Took a sucide trip on the Yellowhead to make it to the Space and Science Centre (I'm not calling it the Telus World of Science.  Its like calling the Coliseum, Rexal!!  WTF?) before the 10am movie started, and HELL YA (!!!!!!!!!!!!,) I make it there.  We left a teensy bit late, so I drove to make it there on time.  Yay, SUICIDE!!!!!!  But we made it there, and saw Stormchasers on IMAX.  Anyone who know me, knows I love crazy ass storms!  Anyway, giving the movie 2 thumbs up, and still pissy about the little brats that sat behind us and whispered thruout the whole movie.  I actually went to their teacher after and complained.  Apparently SHHHHHHHHHHHHH(!!!!!!!!!) means nothing to the brats.  James was surprised that I actually went up to the teacher to complain.  i told him that once I noticed the whispering, IT WAS ALL I COULD HEAR!  Like little mosquitos in your room, on hot summers night.  Ahhh, missing summer.  But thats another story.  After we left the S&SC, we went home to pick up our darling angel.......can't type that with a straight face!  Hell will not accept my cat-she is too evil for the DEVIL!!!!!!!!!  We made it to the vet without incident, Viper (yes, her name is Viper) likes car rides, as long as she isnt in the box.  So, we exit the car, and bravely, the 3 of us head to the vet.  Two of us walking and one on my shoulder........

She got nervous when we got in. We had a bit of a wait, so she was on my shoulder, then hiding behind me on the chair. So, then we go into the room, and she roams form my shoulders, to my head, then to James's shoulder and his head. Back and forth. Finally she gets brave enough to venture down onto the table. Mr. Vet made the BAD mistake of going to pet her. Viper is not fond of strangers, esp. strangers that hurt her last time. Mr. Vet bled. We were like sorry, sorry sorry sorry! He said it was his own fault. Then came time for the shots.....oh boy. So Jill, the vet assistant comes in with a towel to cover Viper. She panicked. Cant blame her, tho. So we all held her down and the 1st shot went in fine. Then she flipped. Literally. The V.A couldn’t control her, and made the mistake of grabbing her by the scruff of the neck, which she HATES, and grabbing her bum, which she hates even more! V.A now bleeding and looking terrified. Viper on table hissing at Vet and V.A, glaring at James and I. V.A goes to grab talon gloves for the 2nd shot, but throws towel on Viper before she leaves the room. Now Viper mad. I don’t see why she had to do that, she took forever coming back. Anyway, Viper under towel losing her mind. Towel was stinky (VERY stinky) and Viper was scared. So, I grab Viper use, what James calls my "mom voice", and tell her to calm down. As soon as she knew it was me that had her, she stopped moving, but kept growling. I have her on the table, trying to soothe her for the next round of shots, and the vet looks at me, and grabs the needle. BINGO! Second (and last) shot in! Whew! Towel comes off, Viper back on my shoulders, and NOT COMING DOWN!!! Also hissing at the vet, who was laughing by now. So, I ask if he will clip her nails. Well, he almost has a heart attack from laughing. So, no clippy nails. We have to do that ourselves. Doh.

Thus concludes the tails of the trip to the trip to the Vet.

Well, almost.  She goes back in a month for her one year shots.  Here we go again......

**AH